Just Start Talking: Friendsgiving

Yesterday night was one of the most special nights I’ve had in a long time. While it didn’t involve strangers that I met on the street or weirdos that started talking to me on the bus, instead it involved a group of women, some who I have known for almost a decade and some who I am just beginning to know.  The night, also known as “Friendsgiving,” is a tradition that I have now taken part in for my second year and one I hope to take part in for many years to come. “Friendsgiving,” named by my friends Juliana and Addie, is a get-together that usually takes place a few days before Thanksgiving. It involves a potluck of delicious Thanksgiving inspired food, a great deal of red wine, and a book of thanks that each woman writes in throughout the night and reads to the group at the end of the night.

I’ll take you through the night to get a better sense of how special it was. While this eclectic and quite amazing group of women were invited over at 7:00, I had previously tutored and therefore came late, walking into an apartment smelling of roasting turkey and brussell sprouts with bacon (made by a vegetarian Jew and AMAZING).  As I turned the corner to the living room, I was happily greeted by smiling women, all of whom were chatting, drinking wine, and eating delicious cheese and crackers.  Quickly, I rushed to the kitchen to prepare my non-cooked addition to the potluck (thanks Cosco for the cheap veggie platters) and joined in to the conversations about work, life, and love.

While most of these women I rarely see, the conversations flowed freely for though we are very different, we all share a passion for children, working hard, good food, and the search for love.  One friend talked to me about her confusion with a recent tumultuous relationship, while another shared her immense work ethic and the difficulty of finding balance with work and every other aspect of life. One friend is searching for what she wants to do with her career while another is thriving in a career she has been in for almost five years. One amazing woman just moved on from a difficult relationship and another is living happily with her man. Each conversation brought a newfound respect for these women as well as the feeling that I was surrounded by people who were not just ordinary, but living their lives constantly in search of growth and wisdom.

After the perfectly cooked turkey (which is one difficult feat) was served and the corn bread, cranberries, pumpkin bars and crispy cookies were devoured, we all cuddled together and opened the “Book of Thanks” that we had each taken turns writing in throughout the night. As the first woman began her praise of life and friendships, the tears of both joy and difficulty started to fall and didn’t end until every woman had shared her joys and struggles throughout the year. After the final entry was read and the book was closed, we were all teary eyed and snottie, but we were also refreshed with a sense of love only brought on by true friends.

This Friendsgiving, I realized that while I get pearls of wisdom and life lessons from random people I meet every day, the greatest wisdom and joy I get is from the people who will be in my life forever. And for that, I am truly thankful.

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